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January 09, 2006


Thanks for the excerpt. It was a very interesting party that you went to.

So, what do you see as the cause and the effect of these twenty and thirty somethings who are living between college and marriage?

Are they really living between the two? Do they have marriage in sight?

Brian, this is a great question. In fact, there are so many levels of answer--none of which is quite satisfactory--to that question. However, in short, some of my observations thus far include: a divorce culture creating fear in both genders, rampant sex outside of marriage and the rise of internet pornography diminishing the drive for marriage among men, women no longer needing men for a socio-economic place in the culture, an emphasis in our culture on self-sufficiency, relationships existing between men and women apart from the guidance/protection of family/community, and basic confusion about what it means to be a woman and what it means to be a man. So, yes, perhaps that does breed a basic ambivalence about marriage at a core level, even if it remains a theoretical desire.

Wow... that was a lot packed into one paragragh. I almost ran out of breath when I read it.

I see much truth in each of those factors you named. One I had not thought very much about is the fear factor due to a divorce culture. Do you think that some singles are scared of the hardship and difficulty in a marriage? I know that in the affluence that so many young people have experienced due to their own parents success some have forgotten or never experienced what pain or difficulty is really like. We are a culture that shys away from difficult and hardship.

I am not sure if your book covers this but I think it would be interesting to have a book that had each chapter dedicated towards one person's brief biographical sketch as it relates to their pursuit of marriage or journey in singleness.

Dear Connally, I am a 42 year old single mom and I am currently reading your book. I just got to the part when your Scottish friend talked to you about suffering prophetically. I had to put it down as it brought tears to my eyes. My favorite scripture is 2 Tim. 3:1-8 (actually the whole chapter is good). It brings me hope that Jesus cannot be too far away. Be glad you are not a single mom during this time, it is more than tough. Thanks for your book.

Dear Connally,

I wrote an article on this topic I would like to share with you:

The Unintentionally Single Girl and God's Law

Bad doctrine and the culture war have combined to frustrate many godly Christian women in their desire for a husband.

WORLD magazine's recent article Single and stuck? highlights the problem of those women who were raised as god-fearing Christians wanting marriage but stuck in singleness. They want to fulfill the normal desire of every young girl to have a husband and a family. But where are the men that are supposed to come calling asking father for their hand, competing to rescuing them from a life of miserable lonely singleness? Sadly, they cannot look to Scripture because, seemingly, the question is not addressed there.

Continued at: http://www.newcovenantpatriarchy.com/index.php/weblog/the_unintentionally_single_girl_and_gods_law/

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